nOt A TyPiCaL dAy...

So who says a typical day in Houston cannot be as thrilling as a day in New York City. When you leave your house in the morning in New York City, you’re bound to run into some Italian Restaurateur yelling at his bus boy, or some homeless person poppin out from the corner scaring the bejesus out of you, or some American Idol wannabe serenading you on his guitar throughout the subway ride to work. In Houston, you can experience the same excitement at a Burger King drive-thru during your lunch break. So I’m one of those not-so-skinny girls who doesn’t shy away from a good, juicy Whopper with cheese every once in a while. So earlier this week as a token of our nation’s newest celebration, I decided to treat my hungry-self to a Burger King Whopper meal. So I’m in the drive-thru lane about to place the order for my meal simultaneously on the phone with my sister when amidst my conversation I thought I heard the girl over the speaker say “your total is $6.27, please drive up to the first window”. So I, an avid Whopper eater, ignore the words entirely, of course, I heard that wrong! So I drive over to the first window, still on the phone, the dude with the thickest accent pokes his head out, and says something which resembles the words “your total is $6.27, ma’am”…now I know I wasn’t in the drive-thru Saltgrass lane so I’m of course staring at this man, smiling, dorki-ly, waiting desperately for him to say “Aha you’re on candid camera”…but that never happens…he keeps looking at me with the I-don’t-have-all-day-for-you-bitch-get-out-of-the-way-ma’am stare. So I say give the most logical response “are you kidding me?!? You’re telling me the Whopper meal is $6.27 sir?!? I mean is the recession hitting you guys that hard???!” I’m sorry, on any other given day, I’m a pretty sane, patient, reasonable, and humble person, rather approachable, but I don’t remember the last time I paid this much for a Whopper meal. I remember paying nothing over $5.00 back in the day…is “back in the day” really that back??? So helpless to the domino effect of the recession, the victim – ME - quietly drives up to the second window to claim her diamonds…I mean her Whopper meal…the girl at the window hands me my brown bag, I peek inside to take a look at my sushi-priced Whopper meal, I think I see a sandwich, or is it half of a sandwich, no wait…I think she gave me the kids meal instead…so I look at her and go, “ma’am is this the kids meal?”…she repeats my order like whatever, it's right...then my gaze shifts to the – please let me swallow hard here – FIFTEEN PIECES OF KIDS-SIZED FRIES in my fry holder!!! I couldn’t handle the disaster anymore…I just had to say something smart-ass-y “ma’am there are like FIFTEEN fries in my meal”…I get ignored…of course…annoyed and perplexed by the blatant rip-off, I just wanted to drive away and indulge my mouth to some hot, soft fries…which btw disappeared in like FIFTEEN SECONDS… so lemme ask y'all “does a damn Burger King meal really cost this much these days???” I’m no frugal, $6.27 is not the end of the world but still…have prices risen by such a ghastly proportion??!! I was enthralled for hours!!!

Then this morning, while I was entrenched in my Crude Oil Rigs research, this gentleman walks up to me and introduces himself. It’s pretty typical for people at my workplace to walk over to me to introduce themselves. I’ve only been there for a little over 6 weeks and we have 300 employees just in this office alone, then occasionally we get people from our HQ which is home to another 200-something people. Every day, first thing in the morning, I get hello and hi emails from several of our executives around the world so it’s always a wise idea to keep abreast of who’s who in the company. Anyhow, back to the story, so yeah this pleasant gentleman walks up to me, introduces himself and the name sounding remarkably familiar quickly gives me a common ground and a level of ease to start a conversation with him. He asks me who I’m working for and I tell him who and then what I do for him. Then I ask him “So Jeff, your name sounds familiar, what do you do?”…he goes “oh I’m the President of the Company!” [pause]…HUH? OMG I was sooooooooooooooooooo embarrassed…I’m thinking well hell yeah his name sounded familiar…I’ve only seen it like a 100x in our press releases!!! At that moment, I so badly wanted to pause time like Hiko Nakamura and run and hide under the table…but to my surprise, Jeff was a lot more sympathetic and hospitable than I took him to be…he totally covered up my embarrassment and cracked a joke at his expense…how nice of him… just another reason why I lurve working for my new company…every day holds a pleasant surprise…

So between my BK Rendezvous and an Official Jackass Moment, I think I’m ready for that light at the end of my tunnel…and that light just happens to be none other than Madonna’s concert a week from today…YES my MADGE is finally coming to Texas…and I CANNOT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WAIT TO SEE HER IN CONCERT…

Peace

signed: Thinker-Bell

MUbarack To YoU ToO

I’m back BiiiiAAATCHES!!! This was America’s message this week when she made history – a history we will talk about, boast to, and admire for years to come – a milestone we are so blessed to witness – fruit of the selfless struggle of a man – man, an epitome of all colors, bloods, tongues, and races – representing the diversity, the cornerstone of our society – society which has nurtured times when a 14-year old black kid was killed for talking to a white woman – when a true blood was restrained to the boundaries of his reservation – when an 18-year old mule swallowed pallets of cocaine to seek a better life for her unborn – when a man is killed in the waking hours of the day for wearing a turban on his head – when a woman is stared down in the elevator for covering her head – times, rooted and reminded – of the fear in the last 8 years – fear of not crimes our hands had committed - but fear of what would befall upon us if our crimes were not to be committed – crimes justified in the name of religion and patriotism – all fakeness disguised as “change” – but real “change” has finally arrived – proving to many that we shall no longer seek fear to survive – fear is not power, it is control – and control is not America – WE are America – an “America” who gave birth to civil rights and liberties – an “America” who stood behind her woman and man of all colors at the voting booth – an “America” who held the podium for inspirations like Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, JFK, and John Lennon – an “America” who lends the microphone to Bill Mahr and Bill O’Reilly – an “America” where all bullsh*t is spoken – and heard – and neither is denied of its right or privilege - an “America” where we can choose to be whoever we want, whenever we want, and however we want – an “America” who does not discriminate amongst God(s) – an “America” where change is not only born but lived and appreciated – this week we brought that change back – thank Allah for that – in the words of America’s next 44th President Barack Hussain Obama, “we are the United States of America” – land of freedom – freedom of thought – so we cannot be manipulated anymore by manifested speculation also known as bullsh*t – like Joe the f**kin Plumber – c’mon, do not insult us by setting him as the American Paragon – is it because he’s the only one who’s capable of falling for your crap? America was the country of Joe the Plumber – America is now home to Joe the Intelligent Working Man who is well-rounded, conscientious, intuitive, educated, humble, tolerant, outspoken, progressive, and independent – and guess what? – that man did NOT vote for YOU!!! He voted for the ONE who will appreciate what he has to offer – and will reward him for what he can contribute – but - on the contrary, what if this Joe the Intelligent Working Man happens to be an Arab-American – I mean seriously what would your pious, I-speak-to-God-every-day, family-oriented self do? You do not even think Arabs are decent, hard-working human beings last time I tuned in – how would you converse and level with Joe the Arab – riiiiiite – you defy the very fundamentals on which this astounding nation was established – you insult the very principles our forefathers sacrificed their livelihood for – schools of thought reflected in the man elected (and I repeat that: elected) Barack Hussain Obama – blood of an immigrant, son of a white woman, skin of a black man, and name of a Muslim father – this is America Mrs. Todd Palin – not your well-bred soccer moms – so while the world looks forward to celebrating the rebirth of a nation waking up from 8 years of the Dark Ages, I highly recommend you trot back home, read up on world geography, expand your vocabulary, connect with your true Christian self (for once), stop bribing the officials, stop preaching and start practicing family values, spend some quality time with your pregnant teen, and when days of your short-lived 15 minutes of fame are catching up to you, pamper yourself to a haircut and for god’s sake get rid of those annoying bangs - and please don’t get in the way for we are about to march the streets of Washington in 74 days or less – to yell to the world out loud - Y’ALL, WE ARE BACK…AMERICA IS BACK…Beeeyoootch!!!

signed: Thinker-Bell