There’s this lady who has recently joined our company as a Temp. She’s a 60-something year old grandmother who’s in great shape btw and I mean GREAT shape!!! She’s tall about 5’ 8”, slender, and very active, always on her feet. I really admire her because most days, I just prefer to glue my fiber-filled rear to my most-uncomfortable-office-chair-in-the-world chair. So the other day she was shuffling to finish work early as she had plans after work, so she says. She comments later she trains for the marathon after work. So I, politely, peek over my cubicle and remark “oh wow! Marathon? I’m proud of you!” She turns around, looks me straight in the eye and says, “why are you proud, what do you mean?” I was like ummm u know I’m proud you’re a runner and all. She replies “why are you surprised at I’m a runner?” Now I’m thinking did I say something wrong? Okay in a way I was implying I was proud of her for doing what she was doing considering how old she is when I can’t even finish jogging the 3-mile track at the park considering how old I am! I figured she took offense to what I was intending to say so I succumbed to my cubicle hoping she would leave me alone.
Now…today, on her way out, she stops by my cubicle to inform me her Marathon is this weekend and she’s doing well enough in her training to be able to run the entire race. As she’s walking out, I yell “Good Luck!” She turns around, walks over to me, and says “what do you mean good luck?” Seriously…what is her problem??!!! I mean I’m not saying she needs good luck because she’s old! I’m not even factoring her age in the equation. But then again, am I being offensive if I insinuate such an idea? I mean c’mon wouldn’t YOU be surprised if a 93-year old in YOUR office was going to run the Marathon!!! Would it really be that unwise and inappropriate for you to make a gesture towards their age???
Seriously….
signed: Thinker-Bell
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
1st dAy
It was my baby’s first day of school yesterday!!! He’s 4, in Pre-K, and growing up way too fast. His mommy (my sister) told me there was crying, lots & lots of it…and tears…many of them…and he just wouldn’t let go. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww “he would not let go?!?” Oh how grateful I was not to be there! I would’ve put him right back in the car, driven home, and Google’d “home schooling” options!!! To just imagine my baby holding on to my sister’s leg…my hARt is aching!!! I always thought hospitals and airports are two of the saddest spots on Earth…unfortunately now Pre-K tops the list!
So I call my sister later and she’s laughing about the whole ordeal. She tells me the scene outside the school was too funny…every kid was clinging on to their parent as if their life was at stake. None of them would let go! This made me later ask my mom how I was on my first day of school. She said you let go of my hand so willingly and walked straight into the class without looking back – she reiterated what a disciplined child I was! And I’m thinking: how eccentric is that!?! Did I not suffer from any sort of separation anxiety like every other “normal” child? I can’t help but recall…and I’m not sure if it’s a figment of my imagination or a fraction of my real memory…a lucid memory: I am 3 years old, standing outside my school, dreading to go inside, desperately hoping my mom wouldn’t let go of me! Yet my mom insists I gave her absolutely no hard time. So I say if the memory is indeed real than I sure as hell did a fabulous job of pretending! And my mom should thank me… :)
See, these are all the reasons why I think twice about being a mommy every day. Just when you get used to this little living, breathing, undeniably adorable creature grabbing on to your lap, they start to crawl…right when you catch up, they begin to run from you…just when you get used to chasing after them, they begin to make a mess…just when you get used to cleaning up after them, they want to clean up their own mess…before you know it, they insist on tying their own shoes…and when you finally realize your little baby is growing up, they go off to school!!!
If anything, the experience of being an aunt has made me come closer to my parents. Now I feel why it was so hard for my folks to have to let go…and why they kept insisting on remaining overly & aggressively protective…and why they always just knew what was right for me even when I didn’t. I remember my mom would preach to me every time I rebelled: wait till you’re a parent one day and you shall see…funny if I earned a penny for each time I heard that. It is soooo hard to let go…and man, my baby is only 4 now…imagine how clingy I will be when he’s off to high school. I’ll be JUST LIKE MY MOM…only 10 times more horrible…
signed: Thinker-Bell
So I call my sister later and she’s laughing about the whole ordeal. She tells me the scene outside the school was too funny…every kid was clinging on to their parent as if their life was at stake. None of them would let go! This made me later ask my mom how I was on my first day of school. She said you let go of my hand so willingly and walked straight into the class without looking back – she reiterated what a disciplined child I was! And I’m thinking: how eccentric is that!?! Did I not suffer from any sort of separation anxiety like every other “normal” child? I can’t help but recall…and I’m not sure if it’s a figment of my imagination or a fraction of my real memory…a lucid memory: I am 3 years old, standing outside my school, dreading to go inside, desperately hoping my mom wouldn’t let go of me! Yet my mom insists I gave her absolutely no hard time. So I say if the memory is indeed real than I sure as hell did a fabulous job of pretending! And my mom should thank me… :)
See, these are all the reasons why I think twice about being a mommy every day. Just when you get used to this little living, breathing, undeniably adorable creature grabbing on to your lap, they start to crawl…right when you catch up, they begin to run from you…just when you get used to chasing after them, they begin to make a mess…just when you get used to cleaning up after them, they want to clean up their own mess…before you know it, they insist on tying their own shoes…and when you finally realize your little baby is growing up, they go off to school!!!
If anything, the experience of being an aunt has made me come closer to my parents. Now I feel why it was so hard for my folks to have to let go…and why they kept insisting on remaining overly & aggressively protective…and why they always just knew what was right for me even when I didn’t. I remember my mom would preach to me every time I rebelled: wait till you’re a parent one day and you shall see…funny if I earned a penny for each time I heard that. It is soooo hard to let go…and man, my baby is only 4 now…imagine how clingy I will be when he’s off to high school. I’ll be JUST LIKE MY MOM…only 10 times more horrible…
signed: Thinker-Bell
Thursday, August 20, 2009
D-9
OMG OMG I watched the BESTEST movie EVER – DISTRICT 9!!! Brilliant Movie!!! Worth every penny of my paycheck!!! A spellbinding 2 hours of science-fiction drama presented in a documentary-style narrative with flawless acting, impeccable special effects, and an intense, mind-boggling story…a story which had me so wrapped up with the central characters of the movie that the affect of the movie stayed with me for daysssss. No joke, I can't stop thinking about the movie. IT'S SO DEEP!!! History lovers like me will enjoy the symbolism to the Apartheid and even to the Palestinian conflict which so brilliantly echoes throughout the movie. I always read the reviews before I watch any movie. After I read all the "thumbs-up", 5-star reviews on this movie, I thought to myself man, I'm not going to enjoy this movie now! You know how every time you get hyped up about a movie, it almost always manages to disappoint you. Well this one had the complete opposite effect!!! I fell in love with the movie even more after watching it. The concept totally blew my mind away, never seen anything like it!!! Thank you Hollywood *finally* for bringing a movie with an innovative idea transformed into a splendid script with all fresh faces. The movie starts out slow but you need not be hasty because you really need it to connect with the characters. However 20 minutes into the movie, I was on the edge of my seat holding my breath! I'm a geek, I confess: I'm a die-hard ALIEN fan!!! No, not just any aliens, I'm referring to the classic movie Alien…& Aliens…& Alien Resurrection!!! Sigourney Weaver rocksss… J but anyhow DISTRICT 9 has bumped down The Alien a notch on my list. Peter Jackson is truly a master-mind…trust me, you don't have to be a sci-fi geek to appreciate this movie. If you simply enjoy being entertained at the movie theatre, you MUST see this one. OKAY!!! I have to stop talking now…I don't want to ruin it for you…
signed: Thinker-Bell
Monday, August 17, 2009
bRiDeZiLLa
WHATS WITH THE WORLD TODAY???!!! I mean these people…are they crazy or am I crazy??! Normalcy is on its way to becoming a rare commodity!!! Why is it so hard to find normal people these days???!!! And why is it getting tougher…and tougher…and tougher…as I grow older. You’d think by now the immune system would’ve developed an “anti-virus” to numb the shocks. I mean I’m not complaining…like I said, I love sudden anomalies of life…albeit my instinct reaction is shock, I always get a good laugh at the end! After all, where would our blog be if it wasn’t for them!
Let me tell you a story: I have this friend…no wait, let me back up…I happen to just know this girl who I went to middle school with. I was never really cool with her. During high school yrs, I ran into her maybe a couple of times on random occasions...of brief chatter. After high school, I didn’t see her for the longest time: she went off to some Ivy League school out-of-town. One night, at a friend's wedding, many yrs later I ran into her again & we shared some laughs over good memories...and then in March of 2007, she was added to my Facebook Friends List!!! I’m sure by now y’all must be wondering what’s the point of all this. Well hold on…I just think its imperative for me to draw out my past with this particular woman because I’d really like to summon up the idea *potentially*, after laying out all facts, if this woman is indeed crazy!!!
So thanks to Facebook, I knew exactly where she was vacationing at all times, where she was staying, what train she was taking from Rome to Naples, how lovely the Wall of China appeared from her hotel balcony…well…whatever…if you’re my reader I reckon you’re smart so you know where I’m going with this. Pretty soon her engagement pictures were up followed by every status displaying up-to-the-minute real-time wedding preparation updates. (I’m thinking…) Good for her! At least one of us found a normal man to declare a husband. So one fine day, I get this email from her on FB (mind you a week before her wedding):
Hi, sorry I havent been in touch (I’m guessing: no first name hence a Mass Email Distribution) - been swamped with my wedding stuff and work as usual and moving -- so much to do.
anyhow, I havent had a chance to officially invite you to the wedding festivities. I hope you dont mind but due to capacity issues, I cant invite you to the formal reception on July 11 - Sat, but I would love to have you join us at the Mehendi* (which is way more fun anyway) on Thursday at 8 pm at Parasio Maravilla. I hope you understand. I really want to see you and would love to have you join us but my finance (she really means fiancée) has a large family and we have over 100 folks just coming from out of town.
please let me know if you will be joining us
*Mehendi is a pre-wedding event*
Oooookaaaay soooo I'm not invited to the wedding reception but I'm invited to the pre-wedding event...hmmmh...which would be like going to the rehearsal dinner without the wedding invitation...NiiiCE...is this woman crazy???!!! Was she drunk when she wrote this???
I mean I don’t even know this girl well enough to be receiving an invitation from her in the 1st place…I'm thinking: If I were her, would I really invite me??? This invitation was downright rude, inconsiderate and unacceptable!!! And it desperately needed a response...so I emailed back:
woah...what an odd invitation! A piece of advice [insert friend’s name here]: a wedding is something to be shared with close friends and family. I just consider you an acquaintance. Have fun at the wedding. Sorry, wont be able to make it.
Trust me, it gets better!!!
The next day, this email awaits my presence in my FB inbox:
no worries - actually sorry to have invited you -didnt know you felt so strongly. I officialy un invite you and will also take you off my friends list. I dont believe in acquaintances and dont have time for that - but again appreciate the words of wisdom!!!!
OMG...OMG!!! LMAO...
It keeps getting better!!! Ma’am bridezilla stood by her words *oh she did* and not only did she remove me from her friends’ list, she blocked me on FB which means I can’t ever write her back!
So of course my inability to get the last word in leaves me no choice but to smile and move on. I go to Europe for 3 weeks, come back, and my sister is like “hey you, you’re the highlight of FB these days.” I’m like “what ma’am” She goes, well apparently, your email disturbed the bridezilla so much, she called one of our other common links (note that I refuse to call this common link “a friend”) and cried over what I wrote to her…and then that common link called my friend to tell her “Thinker-Bell shouldn’t have been this rude to the bride-to-be, after all she’s undergoing pre-wedding stress and everyone should be supportive; she didn’t do anything wrong” hmmmh
But c'mon...seriously...was I really rude there??? What about my feelings :( :(
Let me tell you a story: I have this friend…no wait, let me back up…I happen to just know this girl who I went to middle school with. I was never really cool with her. During high school yrs, I ran into her maybe a couple of times on random occasions...of brief chatter. After high school, I didn’t see her for the longest time: she went off to some Ivy League school out-of-town. One night, at a friend's wedding, many yrs later I ran into her again & we shared some laughs over good memories...and then in March of 2007, she was added to my Facebook Friends List!!! I’m sure by now y’all must be wondering what’s the point of all this. Well hold on…I just think its imperative for me to draw out my past with this particular woman because I’d really like to summon up the idea *potentially*, after laying out all facts, if this woman is indeed crazy!!!
So thanks to Facebook, I knew exactly where she was vacationing at all times, where she was staying, what train she was taking from Rome to Naples, how lovely the Wall of China appeared from her hotel balcony…well…whatever…if you’re my reader I reckon you’re smart so you know where I’m going with this. Pretty soon her engagement pictures were up followed by every status displaying up-to-the-minute real-time wedding preparation updates. (I’m thinking…) Good for her! At least one of us found a normal man to declare a husband. So one fine day, I get this email from her on FB (mind you a week before her wedding):
Hi, sorry I havent been in touch (I’m guessing: no first name hence a Mass Email Distribution) - been swamped with my wedding stuff and work as usual and moving -- so much to do.
anyhow, I havent had a chance to officially invite you to the wedding festivities. I hope you dont mind but due to capacity issues, I cant invite you to the formal reception on July 11 - Sat, but I would love to have you join us at the Mehendi* (which is way more fun anyway) on Thursday at 8 pm at Parasio Maravilla. I hope you understand. I really want to see you and would love to have you join us but my finance (she really means fiancée) has a large family and we have over 100 folks just coming from out of town.
please let me know if you will be joining us
*Mehendi is a pre-wedding event*
Oooookaaaay soooo I'm not invited to the wedding reception but I'm invited to the pre-wedding event...hmmmh...which would be like going to the rehearsal dinner without the wedding invitation...NiiiCE...is this woman crazy???!!! Was she drunk when she wrote this???
I mean I don’t even know this girl well enough to be receiving an invitation from her in the 1st place…I'm thinking: If I were her, would I really invite me??? This invitation was downright rude, inconsiderate and unacceptable!!! And it desperately needed a response...so I emailed back:
woah...what an odd invitation! A piece of advice [insert friend’s name here]: a wedding is something to be shared with close friends and family. I just consider you an acquaintance. Have fun at the wedding. Sorry, wont be able to make it.
Trust me, it gets better!!!
The next day, this email awaits my presence in my FB inbox:
no worries - actually sorry to have invited you -didnt know you felt so strongly. I officialy un invite you and will also take you off my friends list. I dont believe in acquaintances and dont have time for that - but again appreciate the words of wisdom!!!!
OMG...OMG!!! LMAO...
It keeps getting better!!! Ma’am bridezilla stood by her words *oh she did* and not only did she remove me from her friends’ list, she blocked me on FB which means I can’t ever write her back!
So of course my inability to get the last word in leaves me no choice but to smile and move on. I go to Europe for 3 weeks, come back, and my sister is like “hey you, you’re the highlight of FB these days.” I’m like “what ma’am” She goes, well apparently, your email disturbed the bridezilla so much, she called one of our other common links (note that I refuse to call this common link “a friend”) and cried over what I wrote to her…and then that common link called my friend to tell her “Thinker-Bell shouldn’t have been this rude to the bride-to-be, after all she’s undergoing pre-wedding stress and everyone should be supportive; she didn’t do anything wrong” hmmmh
But c'mon...seriously...was I really rude there??? What about my feelings :( :(
;)
signed: Thinker-Bell
Sunday, June 28, 2009
MJ…LoVe U 4eVeR!!!!
For the past several months, I've been finding a way to get back into writing. It's like a part of me feels empty that the one passion which consumes my stress is the one I've pushed into the back seat. I've been waking up almost everyday thinking, dreaming about what to write. But this morning I got up feeling an immense part of my childhood missing, as if someone ripped into the good memories stored away in the bucket of my brain. Too many emotions at once – compassion, sadness, numbness, denial…so I got on Facebook this morning and read the note written by my friend KK…and I was moved! Because that was who I was in many ways. I know to some of you, a LEGEND is gone…but to me Michael Jackson is more than a legend. He was my childhood! I think we're all in a way seeking refuge on Facebook because for the first time, the entire world has found a connection…regardless of race, religion, age, status, political denomination, we all come together to praise a voice which conquered the world like no other King!! In the words of Jimi Hendrix: "Music doesn't lie. If there is something to be changed in this world, then it can only happen through music"
I was born into music!! My parents were in a way a Pakistani version of a 1970s hippie couple. My dad did pride himself on the surround sound system he blew up loud in the streets of our P.E.C.H.S neighborhood back in the late 70s, early 80s. He was practically the designated Street DJ! I remember every evening, boys who played cricket on the streets would yell out song requests over the balcony and my dad would humbly comply with all. When I was a kid, my dad had a record collection like no other – no kidding (well okay maybe aside from Tayyab Uncle's)!! Not only that, someone who had a lot of free time on their hands would record Top Of The Pops and Solid Gold overseas and send us the recorded VHS tapes…so I grew up to Jimi Hendrix, The Beatles, Dire Straits, Kenny Rogers, Led Zeppelin, The Moody Blues, ABBA, Boney M…that's when I discovered the album Off The Wall. I remember my dad used to tell me about the Jackson 5 – they weren't a big hit in Pakistan but my dad claimed Michael was one of the best voices he had heard. So I remember dancing to Michael Jackson around the living room when I was barely 3 yrs old. Music to me was an escape into a fairy tale! And my dance was my dad's pride and joy…my parents once made me perform a dance on a table in a bar in Bangkok…which was full of men dressed up as women… mind you I was 3 years old!!
When Thriller came out, I remember we all cozied up in our family room in Pakistan to watch it. I was afraid for my life hiding behind my mom the entire time the movie played. It took me several takes to finally finish it. My parents told me it was inspired by a horror movie classic "An American Warewolf in London"…and then they made me watch that movie too??!! But Thriller became the ultimate symbol of our Khandaan (aka entire desi family) back in the 80s. My dad played Billie Jean on his prized Bose speakers every night, my mamum meticulously listened to & wrote lyrics (I swear) to Billie Jean and Thriller on a piece of notebook paper which I begged 4 every time I wanted to sing along to MJ…so you know I wouldn't rape the lyrics like "Billie Jean, But My Lover" or "Beat It, No Ones Going to Eat It Eat It". My sisters and I used to stand in front of the TV practicing all his dance moves. And along the way we recruited other idiots as well…Sadia, Seher…& totally ditched Sana *lolz* And then almost every day we played the Solid Gold episode in which Thriller was ranked the #1 song…repeatedly tortured every guest who walked into our house into watching that very Solid Gold episode…I swear MJ shall never know but my family has been a 100% active UNpaid Agent of his in Pakistan! I remember my parents telling me "this is a real-life gang of NY" in the video Beat It and I was like "whatever…" They were a walking-talking-breathing MJ Encyclopedia! When one of my khalas got married in early 80s, every night, the melodies of Michael Jackson and Madonna echoed inside the shaamianas (aka tents). My cousins would break dance like MJ – one even attempted to do the moonwalk…we all had 2 refrain from laughing…indeed MJ was a Khandaani Icon!!! And remained a dream I would meet one day…
In 1987, when BAD came out, I was in L.A. at Kaku's place glued to the TV to the Martin Scorsese's directed video which I later viewed a 100-something times. When we arrived in Pakistan and my parents discovered that WE HAD BAD…!!!...they were so excited they made a deal with the neighborhood Video store…BAD for free movies for a month! Every time I watched MJ, he inspired me to another level. I was just entirely mesmerized over this man…his moves, his songs, his style, his clothes, his gloves, his high-waters. For days I'd sit in front of the TV in awe over wailing fans being dragged from his concerts by security guards, screaming fans tearing off their shirts while desperately trying to catch a glimpse of him…and then passing out when they did! I prayed to God that one day, ONE DAY, I would be just like one of those CRAZY A$$ folks…it was MY DREAM…
When I moved to the States, I continued his legacy and never gave up on that dream. So when Asim was born, I made sure he was exposed to the same insanity I had exposed myself to. By the time Asim was 3, he was well-versed in songs P.Y.T *thanks to Jabbawockeez's brilliant performance on ABDC* and Beat It! I kid you not, after abba, ammi, nana, nani, and kaala, his next words were "Mykul Dakson" – to this day the minute he climbs on to his car seat in my car, he says "Henna Kaala, P.Y.T!"
So comes 2009, it becomes apparent that my ultimate dream to slam myself against a million other people, tear my shirt in half and scream MJ's name out at the top of my lungs was finally going to come true! MJ unveiled to his fans in London his series of concerts – "final curtain call" – voila! This was to be my pilgrimage of the century! The night his tickets went on sale, Salem and I stayed up the entire night, and then the following day, on the stupid TicketMaster website searching desperately for tickets. After several hours of failed attempts, I decided to use the rolodex route and thanks to Zia, I was able to get my hands on 2 4th row center floor tickets to July 14th concert…and then months later my dream crashed….
Now I know why I'm having such a hard time dealing with MJ's death. My dream to see Michael Jackson will never be fulfilled…he is a symbol of my happy childhood…he gave me good memories…he inspired my parents so they could inspire me with the same intensity…he's inspired generations before me and will continue to inspire generations after me…he has brightened up weddings…he has connected families…he gave us friends… he made a child dream: he made me dream. …and he is my HIStory! I feel better now…
"If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, than everything that happens in between can be dealt with" – Michael Jackson, 1958-2009
signed: Thinker-Bell
Monday, March 2, 2009
WORD OF THE DAY!
OBDURATE: (pronounced abh-duhr-uht) hardened in feeling; resistant to persuasion; unyielding; tenacious
signed: Thinker-Bell
signed: Thinker-Bell
YoU?!??...yEs...YoU
So…strange things have been occurring in my life lately…not events but random people just making bizarre comments out of nowhere…and I’m no complainer…strangely as it may seem I rather enjoy the eccentricities of life…I welcome insanity with open arms… it amazes me how some people function on the lack of filter between their brain and their tongue…its like a slippery slope on Comedy Central!!! Like one time I told some random woman I was a Muslim and she replied “oh really? ohhhh…but they’re such nice people…I have this Muslim fri…” I lost her 2 seconds ago…rite after “but”…I just let it go…you know I’m sure the poor lady didn’t really mean what she was sayin. It was funny tho…one time I was having a healthy debate with a Democrat that Barack Obama’s middle name Hussain is a Muslim name. She wouldn’t agree with me…or more like she didn’t want to agree with me. I think finally when I was able to convince her she felt silent…I think I may have influenced her vote just then…shit! So I know Muslims are sort-a at the bottom of the food chain these days…sort-a…I mean it’s not that bad I may be exaggerating here but most people would like to believe we come sour, societies just get lucky when we turn up fresh!!! So anyhow I’m out dining with my 2 bosses and soon-to-be-3rd boss…well let me first back track a bit to sum history about my 2 bosses…2 of the most pleasant gentlemen I’ve worked with EVER (& such a relief from the last male boss I had to work under). Both of my bosses are worldly gentlemen, you know, well-travelled & all. And have been to Pakistan (where I’m originally from) so you know I hart them, I love international folks!!! One of my bosses is originally from England actually, Manchester, funny guy, adores desi food. Anyhow, so while we’re eating, my soon-to-be-3rd boss asks for my insight into the recent terrorist attacks in India. And you know I start off on my typical spiel…"good and bad people everywhere"…blah blah blah…"I denounce terrorism"…blah blah blah…then he goes "well you see, you people...I just don’t get you people, I mean there’s no changing, no persuasion, no modernization…." YOU PEOPLE???!!! What...sir? I'm an American...I mean did I miss the part where I belong to some tribe or sumthing...sir, are you insane??? For the first couple of minutes I was a bit stunned...but then...I actually LOOOOVED it…I wasn't perturbed at all...I was thoroughly enjoying my YOU PEOPLE moment...I mean c'mon can't blame my 60-something year old southern boss from Forth Worth Texas… they are doing the best they can…being exposed to Muslim people yelling & screaming yallayallayallayalla on TV burning American flags can leave you tainted you know…if that’s all you’re ever exposed to…sadly…
signed: Thinker-Bell
signed: Thinker-Bell
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
AhHhHhHhHhHh...
So my agony these days is fighting to keep quality television alive!!! What’s up with all my good shows getting cancelled on TV??? I’m beginning to get AAA—NO—ED by that!!! It’s like I get addicted and God’s wrath unleashes on me…am I the only one out there who digs good television??? First it was Fugitive, Justice, The Evidence, The Nine, Cashmere Mafia, Invasion, Smith, Women’s Murder Club, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip…now I heard Fox is pulling the plug on Prison Break…and I’m like whaaaaat???!!! Prison Break is one of the BEST plots on television…& who cares if it’s beginning to get a little dragg-y…for the sake of one full hour of Wentworth Miller and Dominic Purcell can FOX please refrain itself from opining??? I mean I had barely recovered from NBC taking my girls away from me when they cancelled Lipstick Jungle last season (don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive NBC for that!!!) My coerced TV “divorce” from Victory Ford was a sodding heartache. After Sex and the City, this was one show about fabulous single girls I thoroughly enjoyed every Wednesday night…then Friday nights…!!! What has gone wrong with people’s likes & dislikes!!! I mean what is the TV audience watching these days I’d like to know??? Heroes??? PUH-LEEASE…This much-prolonged disappearance of good television has left me so intensely scarred lately that now I’m practically afraid to get emotionally attached to a series. You know the feeling when you meet a guy on a blind date who’s so adorable you almost wanna f**k things up before he could get to breaking your heart???!!! Almost THAT kind of feeling has been consuming me lately. But you know what? This sorta shit happens to me a lot especially with lipsticks!!! Every time and I mean EVERY TIME I religiously start buying a shade of lipstick, it’ll get discontinued within months. I remember back in college I fell in love with this lavender shade by Revlon. I mean it wasn’t even a lipstick; it was one of those lipstick-looking eye shadows my friend had been hooked on for years before she inspired me…DISCONTINUED…like a year after I began trying it on. The my friend and I searched and searched until we “discovered” we were no longer Lavender girls rather Pink girls so we treated ourselves to this amazingly KUYOOT pink shade of lipstick Rose Taffeta by Victoria Secret – let me remind you – from their classic line of make-up…hmm…DISCONTINUED…a year later. My friend then stopped letting me in on her make-up tips…I think she seriously believed I carried the lipstick-discontinuation curse on me. You see I’m not big on make-up; I don’t go on crazy shopping sprees at Sephora and buy $200 worth of make-up. I only spend my $$ on lipsticks and even then it’s like on one…which I’ll wear ALL the time. So it’s quite heart-wrenching when you’ve been stripped off that one shade of lipstick your lips are so eagerly attached to. And mind you, I dedicate on average 5,000 man hours of research to find that one lipstick…so we’re talking one woman’s undeniable hard work going down the drain!!! These days I’m in love with Catfight by NARS…and I’m almost out of it…but I’m afraid…like for my life to walk into Sephora & be disappointed…again. I don’t think I’ll be able to handle the news by myself. I may need a friend to hold hands with me or pass me the handkerchief when those Goth-looking make-up overdosed chicks…or men...give me the bad news….and I swear I’ll feel all the same if they take away LOST or Gossip Girl from me…!!!
Btw, isn’t Lie To Me just precious little hour of television???!!! I absolutely LURVE the show!!! Its right after American Idol on Wednesdays at 9/8 Central. I’ve always been a fan of Tim Roth and he absolutely ROCKS on this show…
signed: Thinker-Bell
Btw, isn’t Lie To Me just precious little hour of television???!!! I absolutely LURVE the show!!! Its right after American Idol on Wednesdays at 9/8 Central. I’ve always been a fan of Tim Roth and he absolutely ROCKS on this show…
signed: Thinker-Bell
Saturday, January 31, 2009
50 RaNdOm ThInGs AbOuT mE!!!
So I was sold on this hype on Facebook – to list “25 Random Things About Me”. And then of course when I began to jot down all that I knew about me, my list expanded to a 100 in less than an hour. I finally succumbed to 50. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing them down!!!
1. I was born 11 ½ lbs – till this day I’m shedding those pounds. People refused to carry me when I was a baby; they claimed their arms ached after a few seconds. By the age of 6, I was anorexic. My mom then had my tonsils removed and fed me all kinds of food. I miss my tonsils
2. I was in the school dance team for a year and a half. I wore short skirts to football games & performed at half-times – my parents NEVER missed a football game – they came to watch all my performances – I quit because the girls were bitchy…but I still LOVE dancing
3. As a kid, I got bullied, I could never stand up for myself. My sisters were my protectors. One time this girl attacked me by throwing a coke can (full of coke) to my face…can missed me by inches…coke inside didn’t…before I could recover I saw my sister Sana fly over me like one of the Asian chicks from Crouching Tiger & Hidden Dragon yelling “stay away from my sister, you bitch!” oh she did. But I never filed charges
4. I once filed charges against an ex – a restraining order…it is no longer in affect…he’s married
5. I HATE confrontations. I just ignore people. Politely
6. I LOVE debates…anything political or social or racial gets my attention. Intellect intrigues me – I call it a BRAIN-GASM!!!
7. I don’t like being scolded or criticized. I’d like to think I know everything…I do know everything
8. I LOVE cereal. I can have cereal ANY HOUR of the day all day. In fact when I die, I’d like to have Frosted Flakes and Basic Four buried with me
9. I suffer from extreme road rage. I DESPISE people who drive below 70 mph in the fast lane – I think D.O.T should have a system set up where people like these automatically get ejected from the left lane. My family thinks I’ll die getting shot on the freeway
10. I eat a serving of trail mix nuts and drink a cup of milk every day, except when I’m on the GM diet
11. I LOVE horror movies. As a kid, I loved playing the bad guy. I always played the witch. I wasn’t a disturbed child
12. I barely spoke as a kid. My parents would drag me to visit my aunts and uncles and I could practically stay silent for 10 hrs straight. Now I love to talk. I’m a story-teller
13. I LOVE to exaggerate with numbers…anytime a number is part of a conversation, I’d like to talk in thousands and millions, like “oh my god I’ve called that number like 5000 times or…I wore that shoe 12,765 times or…I think I may have dated like a million men by now” I don’t believe in including numbers less than a 1000 in my conversation…it’s dullsville
14. I truly believe EVERYTHING in life happens for a reason. Nothing is EVER incidental. Not even this list of 1,675 things about me
15. I DREAM of running into my special someone EVERYDAY. I KNOW I have already crossed paths with the man I’m going to marry. I just don’t know who he is
16. Grammar FACTS: I hardly ever get my idioms right. Best invention – Exclamation Mark!!! (I like 3 of them) Don’t believe in periods (or full stops for my Paki friends) – “…” is the 2nd best invention (dot dot dot). Favorite English word: “So”!!!
17. I’m NOT a planner. I leave everything up to the last minute. I like the pressure of time closing in on me, it makes me think quicker and act smarter, otherwise I tend to procrastinate a lot. I’m NOT an organizer too
18. Every night I set the alarm, I press the alarm button 3 times to make sure the alarm is on…it’s never once or twice or 4 times, it’s always 3 times. Weird, huh?
19. I think SNL is over-rated, Seinfeld is a show I absolutely cannot relate to, and Friends are NOT cute???!!!! Phoebe is annoying, Anniston is blaaah, Courtney Cox should’ve been the hype
20. I have a list of men I’d like to marry one day. Many have entered/exited but the one who tops the list now is DANIEL CRAIG
21. I HATE people who confuse opinions with facts…and try to convince you their opinion is either a fact or better than yours…Brad Pitt is good looking – OPINION!...Obama is the first black president of the U.S. – FACT! Get the difference!
22. My biggest pet peeve – when people steal other people’s friends mischievously…I have a strong tendency to attract those kind
23. I LOVE the smell of coffee. I’m addicted to tea
24. I’m addicted to music, best invention of man-kind -à iPOD. I download tunes every week. In fact, after watching a movie, I’m the idiot who’s downloading the soundtrack…yes, I actually pay attention to the score in the background
25. I was once addicted to the smell of gasoline. My father caught me one time sniffing through the back window of our car…we were at a gas station…I don’t remember what happened next
26. I once walked in on my parents “doing it”…I don’t remember what happened next
27. I’m a TV junkie – as of this moment I’m watching 10 shows…I used to watch 8 more but they were all cancelled. My top 3 TV shows of all times: Three’s Company, Sex and the City, LOST
28. I’m a work-out-aholic. I also run 9 miles a week
29. When I burp, the earth rumbles, and all my sisters will begin moving left to right acting as if an earth quake just hit us…(it’s a family joke)…but that’s how loud my burps are…if there’s ever a competition for the loudest burp, I will win it – FACT!
30. I don’t believe in best friends; I believe in good friends
31. I have a fear of heights
32. I’ve had this (same) recurring nightmare ever since I was a kid. My nightmares always include my house I grew up in Pakistan
33. I despise cooking, cleaning, and anything that involves me doing any sort of labor around the house. FACT: I do not know how to work the washer dryer. I’ve done laundry twice in my life – I had written down the instructions on a pink sticky note – I threw away the note later; FACT: I do not know how to work the dishwasher
34. I want to be married to a man who’s humble, loyal, intellectual, possessive, respectful, and never stingy, will always laugh at all my jokes, and be a traveler. Then I want to have 4 kids with him – Suleman, Enjeel, Harris, and Hira. I may have a 5th one after I reach 50
35. I LOVE to write – I LOVE to blog – I LOVE my blog
36. I have a fear of Randall’s…I’m convinced white people who shop there do not like brown people
37. I HATE stingy people
38. My favorite movie of all times is As Good As It Gets – I’ve watched it a gazillion times (see my infatuation with big numbers?)
39. The song “Khwaab” from Junoon always makes me cry…instantly
40. I believe SAM changed my life – Sam was my hair stylist
41. I HATE when people chew food with their mouths open – it ANNOYS me
42. My dream is to be in the FBI…working in Forensics…for that I want to get a Masters in Anthropology
43. I HATE money talk. I HATE small talk
44. Any time I’m making a conversation with someone and I forget what I was about to say next or I can’t remember something, I will zone out everything and everyone around me UNTIL I remember…I have called people at 4am to ask them about a movie or an event I couldn’t think of…I will not rest until I KNOW…it’s my worst habit…it ANNOYS every1 around me
45. I LOVE dropping the F-Bomb…but I will absolutely NEVER say holy moly or good gosh. “Are you INSANE?” is my favvvvorite phrase in the world
46. I spend 40% of time EACH DAY looking at myself in the mirror
47. I LOVE books. One day I want to have a huge library in my house
48. I LOVE shopping – it’s an escape, an aphrodisiac – shoes are my fetish - fashion is my motto. My Fashion Icon-ite - Siena Miller. Oh and I LOVE layering – I have been known to have put on 5 shirts at one time, and that doesn’t count the jacket
49. My 2009 resolution – to get a tattoo!BEST feeling in the world (following 2nd best: cleaning my ear with a Q-tip) is to be greeted by my nephew Asim and my niece Malaika. They’re the most yummy-licious priceless pieces of gems of my life. My heart melts when I enter my house and they both run over to hug me. All my worries dissolve, all my heartache disappears, the moment I lay my eyes on them. They both are the true blessings of my life
signed: Thinker-Bell
1. I was born 11 ½ lbs – till this day I’m shedding those pounds. People refused to carry me when I was a baby; they claimed their arms ached after a few seconds. By the age of 6, I was anorexic. My mom then had my tonsils removed and fed me all kinds of food. I miss my tonsils
2. I was in the school dance team for a year and a half. I wore short skirts to football games & performed at half-times – my parents NEVER missed a football game – they came to watch all my performances – I quit because the girls were bitchy…but I still LOVE dancing
3. As a kid, I got bullied, I could never stand up for myself. My sisters were my protectors. One time this girl attacked me by throwing a coke can (full of coke) to my face…can missed me by inches…coke inside didn’t…before I could recover I saw my sister Sana fly over me like one of the Asian chicks from Crouching Tiger & Hidden Dragon yelling “stay away from my sister, you bitch!” oh she did. But I never filed charges
4. I once filed charges against an ex – a restraining order…it is no longer in affect…he’s married
5. I HATE confrontations. I just ignore people. Politely
6. I LOVE debates…anything political or social or racial gets my attention. Intellect intrigues me – I call it a BRAIN-GASM!!!
7. I don’t like being scolded or criticized. I’d like to think I know everything…I do know everything
8. I LOVE cereal. I can have cereal ANY HOUR of the day all day. In fact when I die, I’d like to have Frosted Flakes and Basic Four buried with me
9. I suffer from extreme road rage. I DESPISE people who drive below 70 mph in the fast lane – I think D.O.T should have a system set up where people like these automatically get ejected from the left lane. My family thinks I’ll die getting shot on the freeway
10. I eat a serving of trail mix nuts and drink a cup of milk every day, except when I’m on the GM diet
11. I LOVE horror movies. As a kid, I loved playing the bad guy. I always played the witch. I wasn’t a disturbed child
12. I barely spoke as a kid. My parents would drag me to visit my aunts and uncles and I could practically stay silent for 10 hrs straight. Now I love to talk. I’m a story-teller
13. I LOVE to exaggerate with numbers…anytime a number is part of a conversation, I’d like to talk in thousands and millions, like “oh my god I’ve called that number like 5000 times or…I wore that shoe 12,765 times or…I think I may have dated like a million men by now” I don’t believe in including numbers less than a 1000 in my conversation…it’s dullsville
14. I truly believe EVERYTHING in life happens for a reason. Nothing is EVER incidental. Not even this list of 1,675 things about me
15. I DREAM of running into my special someone EVERYDAY. I KNOW I have already crossed paths with the man I’m going to marry. I just don’t know who he is
16. Grammar FACTS: I hardly ever get my idioms right. Best invention – Exclamation Mark!!! (I like 3 of them) Don’t believe in periods (or full stops for my Paki friends) – “…” is the 2nd best invention (dot dot dot). Favorite English word: “So”!!!
17. I’m NOT a planner. I leave everything up to the last minute. I like the pressure of time closing in on me, it makes me think quicker and act smarter, otherwise I tend to procrastinate a lot. I’m NOT an organizer too
18. Every night I set the alarm, I press the alarm button 3 times to make sure the alarm is on…it’s never once or twice or 4 times, it’s always 3 times. Weird, huh?
19. I think SNL is over-rated, Seinfeld is a show I absolutely cannot relate to, and Friends are NOT cute???!!!! Phoebe is annoying, Anniston is blaaah, Courtney Cox should’ve been the hype
20. I have a list of men I’d like to marry one day. Many have entered/exited but the one who tops the list now is DANIEL CRAIG
21. I HATE people who confuse opinions with facts…and try to convince you their opinion is either a fact or better than yours…Brad Pitt is good looking – OPINION!...Obama is the first black president of the U.S. – FACT! Get the difference!
22. My biggest pet peeve – when people steal other people’s friends mischievously…I have a strong tendency to attract those kind
23. I LOVE the smell of coffee. I’m addicted to tea
24. I’m addicted to music, best invention of man-kind -à iPOD. I download tunes every week. In fact, after watching a movie, I’m the idiot who’s downloading the soundtrack…yes, I actually pay attention to the score in the background
25. I was once addicted to the smell of gasoline. My father caught me one time sniffing through the back window of our car…we were at a gas station…I don’t remember what happened next
26. I once walked in on my parents “doing it”…I don’t remember what happened next
27. I’m a TV junkie – as of this moment I’m watching 10 shows…I used to watch 8 more but they were all cancelled. My top 3 TV shows of all times: Three’s Company, Sex and the City, LOST
28. I’m a work-out-aholic. I also run 9 miles a week
29. When I burp, the earth rumbles, and all my sisters will begin moving left to right acting as if an earth quake just hit us…(it’s a family joke)…but that’s how loud my burps are…if there’s ever a competition for the loudest burp, I will win it – FACT!
30. I don’t believe in best friends; I believe in good friends
31. I have a fear of heights
32. I’ve had this (same) recurring nightmare ever since I was a kid. My nightmares always include my house I grew up in Pakistan
33. I despise cooking, cleaning, and anything that involves me doing any sort of labor around the house. FACT: I do not know how to work the washer dryer. I’ve done laundry twice in my life – I had written down the instructions on a pink sticky note – I threw away the note later; FACT: I do not know how to work the dishwasher
34. I want to be married to a man who’s humble, loyal, intellectual, possessive, respectful, and never stingy, will always laugh at all my jokes, and be a traveler. Then I want to have 4 kids with him – Suleman, Enjeel, Harris, and Hira. I may have a 5th one after I reach 50
35. I LOVE to write – I LOVE to blog – I LOVE my blog
36. I have a fear of Randall’s…I’m convinced white people who shop there do not like brown people
37. I HATE stingy people
38. My favorite movie of all times is As Good As It Gets – I’ve watched it a gazillion times (see my infatuation with big numbers?)
39. The song “Khwaab” from Junoon always makes me cry…instantly
40. I believe SAM changed my life – Sam was my hair stylist
41. I HATE when people chew food with their mouths open – it ANNOYS me
42. My dream is to be in the FBI…working in Forensics…for that I want to get a Masters in Anthropology
43. I HATE money talk. I HATE small talk
44. Any time I’m making a conversation with someone and I forget what I was about to say next or I can’t remember something, I will zone out everything and everyone around me UNTIL I remember…I have called people at 4am to ask them about a movie or an event I couldn’t think of…I will not rest until I KNOW…it’s my worst habit…it ANNOYS every1 around me
45. I LOVE dropping the F-Bomb…but I will absolutely NEVER say holy moly or good gosh. “Are you INSANE?” is my favvvvorite phrase in the world
46. I spend 40% of time EACH DAY looking at myself in the mirror
47. I LOVE books. One day I want to have a huge library in my house
48. I LOVE shopping – it’s an escape, an aphrodisiac – shoes are my fetish - fashion is my motto. My Fashion Icon-ite - Siena Miller. Oh and I LOVE layering – I have been known to have put on 5 shirts at one time, and that doesn’t count the jacket
49. My 2009 resolution – to get a tattoo!BEST feeling in the world (following 2nd best: cleaning my ear with a Q-tip) is to be greeted by my nephew Asim and my niece Malaika. They’re the most yummy-licious priceless pieces of gems of my life. My heart melts when I enter my house and they both run over to hug me. All my worries dissolve, all my heartache disappears, the moment I lay my eyes on them. They both are the true blessings of my life
signed: Thinker-Bell
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