So I get on the train on my way home from the hospital. I sit down at the very end of the cart with my friend. We are just talking about the day when a short, round Indian man in his mid thirties with the fresh from the motherland….navy blue jacket, green shirt and brown tapered pants look…walks into the train. He is on the other corner but quickly spots us and automatically switches into his favorite Indian actor Govinda. He begins to serenade me with his much rehearsed in the shower singing routine…”La la la la la…mixed in with some phrases that were familiar but that I could not completely recognize…la la la la la…” I couldn’t help but laugh but of course in their language that means flashing green light…I had unintentionally given him the go ahead…So he stops and comes to stand in front of me hanging over the pole…
Happy short, round Indian man: Are you from India?
My friend, on my behalf, of course I am just staring in shock, nodding my head: No
Surprised short, round Indian man: Then where are you girls from?
My annoyed friend: No where…we are from no where…
Surprised and confused short, round Indian man: “From nowhere? Well she looks like she could be Indian..
Friend: NO!
Eager short, round Indian man: “Her (pointing at me with his middle finger of course) for me?”
My friend: N…O…NO!
Sad short, round Indian man: Sigh…
So he turns around and walks to the doorway and waits for his stop. Not losing hope he starts singing again but now takes out his cool new I Phone...plays with it long enough for me to notice…then puts it away…just giving me a little taste of how “cool” he really is...
Still persistent he comes and takes a loop around the pole one last time and with all his might sings his heart out and exits the train as the doors open…
In the ideal world…he would have been the man of my dreams who comes and sweeps me off my feet…but this is the real world…my world…just another one of those stories to add to the collection….
signed: Macky
Monday, September 29, 2008
Friday, September 19, 2008
NaDiR
continuation of "Rise & Shine...Not Rise & Whine"
So…they say sometimes misery is good for you…it is motivation in disguise…I know because I used mine to dig myself out of my nadir…I had my resume prepared but countless hours of networking, job search and internet research laid ahead. I have to admit looking for a job is teeeeedious…it is practically a full-time job of its own. For at least one month I received zilch responses…as if I was completely non-existent to the outside world…no one was responding to me…it was incredibly frustrating…irateness grew…here I was seeking motivation to change my life instead I was getting discouraged by the minute…it was at that moment I decided to do the inevitable...I decided I would consider moving to New York to find my next dream Market Research job…which meant I was actually ready to cut the cord…yes I’m one of those who still live with my parents…I love my family and I love coming home to them every night but I knew I needed to venture out to seek a better life. So I began to send my resume to companies in New York. In no time I started getting phone calls, emails, leading up to phone interviews resulting in face-to-face interviews. I was in heaven!!! Even though I had no clue how I would go about starting a new life in New York, part of me knew it would come to me in time…I had friends I could rely on for support if I needed…you see I believe in signs…I believe that’s how sometimes God speaks to you…God or your fate…and I saw the sign…and I went towards it! In August, I arrived in New York City for three possible interviews…in a nutshell, my first interview which was at my top-of-the-list company Nielsen Online turned out to be nostalgic…frightening…ODD people…I swear I have not experienced such un-professionalism in an interview before…girls were downright rude…egotistical…bunch of fifteen year olds who rose to fame a little too hastily…it was like being a victim of a good cop/bad cop situation where the good cop stared at the ground without uttering a single word while the bad cop interrogated the bejesus out of me…so you know that didn’t go anywhere. The second company I interviewed with suffered a 200-person lay-off the day before my interview was set…go figure…and my third interviewer scared the hell out of me…again…twice in a row!!! Am I really that fragile…or inexperienced??? So after my 8th day in NYC, I was burnt out, back to square one with no potential…then the amazing happened…my phone rang and this Corporate Recruiter with a company in Houston gave me hope…to come back home and give his company a chance. I arrived in Houston on Friday, interviewed with his company Friday evening and had the offer in my hands the following Friday, exactly a week later!!! At that moment outside Café Express, I realized it couldn’t be any better for me!!! I have my dream Market Research job at a fabulous company, earning the money I desire, and working with a team I feel comfortable with. You see I gave NYC a shot but while I was there, I missed my family and my friends…I missed my life…I knew when the time came, I could survive there but that meant starting a new life with new people, something I’m not too fond of… yet I knew I had to be in NYC for a purpose…each interview I participated in polished and prepared me more for my next …and by the time I interviewed at my new job I was a Pro!!! But not only that, I found out how important it is for me to spend the time I have right now with my family and friends…if I don’t have to then why should I move away from them… if anything life has taught me in the last couple of months is never give up hope, aim for your dream, put your best effort and let good things come to you and you’ll see where change was needed in life for not everything in life is broken…some things in life are truly blessings in disguise…
signed: Thinker-Bell
So…they say sometimes misery is good for you…it is motivation in disguise…I know because I used mine to dig myself out of my nadir…I had my resume prepared but countless hours of networking, job search and internet research laid ahead. I have to admit looking for a job is teeeeedious…it is practically a full-time job of its own. For at least one month I received zilch responses…as if I was completely non-existent to the outside world…no one was responding to me…it was incredibly frustrating…irateness grew…here I was seeking motivation to change my life instead I was getting discouraged by the minute…it was at that moment I decided to do the inevitable...I decided I would consider moving to New York to find my next dream Market Research job…which meant I was actually ready to cut the cord…yes I’m one of those who still live with my parents…I love my family and I love coming home to them every night but I knew I needed to venture out to seek a better life. So I began to send my resume to companies in New York. In no time I started getting phone calls, emails, leading up to phone interviews resulting in face-to-face interviews. I was in heaven!!! Even though I had no clue how I would go about starting a new life in New York, part of me knew it would come to me in time…I had friends I could rely on for support if I needed…you see I believe in signs…I believe that’s how sometimes God speaks to you…God or your fate…and I saw the sign…and I went towards it! In August, I arrived in New York City for three possible interviews…in a nutshell, my first interview which was at my top-of-the-list company Nielsen Online turned out to be nostalgic…frightening…ODD people…I swear I have not experienced such un-professionalism in an interview before…girls were downright rude…egotistical…bunch of fifteen year olds who rose to fame a little too hastily…it was like being a victim of a good cop/bad cop situation where the good cop stared at the ground without uttering a single word while the bad cop interrogated the bejesus out of me…so you know that didn’t go anywhere. The second company I interviewed with suffered a 200-person lay-off the day before my interview was set…go figure…and my third interviewer scared the hell out of me…again…twice in a row!!! Am I really that fragile…or inexperienced??? So after my 8th day in NYC, I was burnt out, back to square one with no potential…then the amazing happened…my phone rang and this Corporate Recruiter with a company in Houston gave me hope…to come back home and give his company a chance. I arrived in Houston on Friday, interviewed with his company Friday evening and had the offer in my hands the following Friday, exactly a week later!!! At that moment outside Café Express, I realized it couldn’t be any better for me!!! I have my dream Market Research job at a fabulous company, earning the money I desire, and working with a team I feel comfortable with. You see I gave NYC a shot but while I was there, I missed my family and my friends…I missed my life…I knew when the time came, I could survive there but that meant starting a new life with new people, something I’m not too fond of… yet I knew I had to be in NYC for a purpose…each interview I participated in polished and prepared me more for my next …and by the time I interviewed at my new job I was a Pro!!! But not only that, I found out how important it is for me to spend the time I have right now with my family and friends…if I don’t have to then why should I move away from them… if anything life has taught me in the last couple of months is never give up hope, aim for your dream, put your best effort and let good things come to you and you’ll see where change was needed in life for not everything in life is broken…some things in life are truly blessings in disguise…
signed: Thinker-Bell
RiSe & sHiNe…nOt RiSe & wHiNe
So…for many weeks (more like months) I have been candidly “whining” about my daily frustrations at work and monotony of life in general. My parents always taught us growing up it is much easier to feel sorry for yourself than attempt to do something about it. Self-Pity is tempting…self-indulging…makes you doubt your own potential to make better…makes you lose faith in yourself. I see self-pity and lack of faith as analogous. It’s easier to blame the society, the world, incidents, accidents, and other people for mishaps than stepping up to take responsibility. And I’m not someone who shies away from responsibility. I remember when I used to take pride in responsibility…it helped define not only the person I was but a person I could be. Yet I lost part of that sensation over the last couple of years because I stopped thinking about dreams and tasks and people and goals which mattered to me and were dearest to me. For instance, I woke up every day to a job I knew I didn’t have my heart into…it wasn’t what I intended to set out to do more than a decade ago when I graduated from College. I knew I had to go back to doing Market Research – one thing I was passionate for as long as I remember! Recently a dear friend asked me to define the term “Market Research” to him…so I set out to explain what it entailed in most basic terms…in the world of B2B (business-to-business), consumer and media research. It was funny because he interrupted me half way to say oh that’s market research?…I always wondered who signed up for such boring stuff… gee I love boring stuff…well I guess that’s when you know something is a passion…when no one else sees it but you! So for a couple of years after College, I managed to make it in the world of Market Research until the late 90s/early 2000s when the economy was hard hit by the dot com bust. Businesses crumbled and unfortunately market research took a back seat. One can’t stick it out without a paycheck for a long time so I jumped at the first opportunity which knocked at my door…where I work now. Four years later, I came to the realization I needed Market Research back in my life…I’m thankful of the awakening…I’ve heard many people spend years searching for their forte and here I had found mine! Right then I knew finding my dream job was going to be a challenging task…to head back into a field I had stayed away from for many years. I had to network hard, research the industry thoroughly, find out who’s who in Market Research, and most importantly, create the right resume…after all YOU are YOUR RESUME!!! I can’t emphasize it enough…for those of you who find yourselves in my shoes…PLEASE focus hard on your resume!!! You won’t believe everything on my to-do list was easy once I took the time out of my day to actually do it…except for writing that darn resume…boy it was the toughest task of all…I now believe all those articles I read which rated the overwhelming task of “writing your resume” as the number one reason people choose to stay in unhappy jobs…I almost decided to just stay the hell where I was fearing the amount of intelligent brainstorming I had to do to write my resume. But…two nights, four-hour sleeps and five cups of tea later, I completed my resume!!! I was now going to rise and shine, not rise and whine!!! Coming up next: my journey into the world of job search...
to be continued…
signed: Thinker-Bell
to be continued…
signed: Thinker-Bell
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
gReY's HoPe
Don’t wonder why people go crazy,
wonder why they don’t
In a course of a day,
wonder how we all keep it together
I got this from one of my favorite shows Grey’s Anatomy. Maybe I am bias to it because it is centered on the lives of residents but in all fairness it is about life. In this particular episode, there is a middle aged woman with a brain tumor who goes on vacation before her scheduled elective surgical procedure which she may or may not survive. Well when she goes on this trip she meets the man of her dreams in the Cinderella story type of way, glass slipper and all. She returns to the hospital on the day of the surgery and requests to have her surgery delayed because the love of her life is supposed to be arriving around 4 pm. Her daughter confides in the surgeons that her mother has been known to make up stories ever since she was diagnosed with the brain tumor and that nobody believes that this man really exists. Despite this, they wait until 5:15 pm with no sign of him. The patient starts crying, “Did I make him up? I couldn’t have, it was so real.”
She is taken into the operating room. During the surgery, they are informed that there is a man asking for their patient. She did not wake up again. She never was able to see that he was real.
I woke up today wondering how we all live our lives and somehow manage not to lose it. We are all faced with so many challenges yet for the most part we come out of it stronger, wiser and ready to take on the next one. It’s the power of the human mind. As a medical student, I meet so many different types of people on a daily basis. Some that are strong enough to deal with it on their own, some that are able to hide their fear, some that do not have any emotions at all, some that go into a state of denial, some that break down. Despite all measurements taken, all we can really offer anyone is hope. Hope that at the end of the day, you will have the ability to accept and work thru what life has presented.
signed: Macky
wonder why they don’t
In a course of a day,
wonder how we all keep it together
I got this from one of my favorite shows Grey’s Anatomy. Maybe I am bias to it because it is centered on the lives of residents but in all fairness it is about life. In this particular episode, there is a middle aged woman with a brain tumor who goes on vacation before her scheduled elective surgical procedure which she may or may not survive. Well when she goes on this trip she meets the man of her dreams in the Cinderella story type of way, glass slipper and all. She returns to the hospital on the day of the surgery and requests to have her surgery delayed because the love of her life is supposed to be arriving around 4 pm. Her daughter confides in the surgeons that her mother has been known to make up stories ever since she was diagnosed with the brain tumor and that nobody believes that this man really exists. Despite this, they wait until 5:15 pm with no sign of him. The patient starts crying, “Did I make him up? I couldn’t have, it was so real.”
She is taken into the operating room. During the surgery, they are informed that there is a man asking for their patient. She did not wake up again. She never was able to see that he was real.
I woke up today wondering how we all live our lives and somehow manage not to lose it. We are all faced with so many challenges yet for the most part we come out of it stronger, wiser and ready to take on the next one. It’s the power of the human mind. As a medical student, I meet so many different types of people on a daily basis. Some that are strong enough to deal with it on their own, some that are able to hide their fear, some that do not have any emotions at all, some that go into a state of denial, some that break down. Despite all measurements taken, all we can really offer anyone is hope. Hope that at the end of the day, you will have the ability to accept and work thru what life has presented.
signed: Macky
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
a NeW dAy!!!
So…I know I have been a slacker blogger lately. And it's not because I don't have anything to write about. It's just you know I feel like I'm at a point in my life where the monotony of it is catching up to me…gradually. I'm a fairly optimistic person who lives and breathes in the present moment and always manages to keep myself occupied. Lately, though, I feel like I'm beginning to lose control of the real me and letting boredom consume me. I HATE being in a state of restlessness. It fuels an idle mind and you know what they say about an idle mind: it is the devil's workshop. And my workshop is a magnet for random thoughts…at times useless ones too…thoughts which tend to drain positive energy out of your mind. See…I've always managed to live the present moment to its fullest and not really worry too much about what lies ahead for me. I believe the decisions we make today lay the foundation for our future…doesn't mean I don't plan ahead of time or indulge in savings at all…I do but I don't allow myself to get caught up in the uncertainties of the future. I'm a GIRL OF THE PRESENT TIME! I've always believed things happen for a reason and if you tread forward in life with just some faith, you'll be surprised how life unveils itself to you in all the right places at the right time. For that reason, I have, on most occasions, remained optimistic about life, myself, where I am now and where I am heading, always with hope and never bearing a single shred of doubt about my right to be happy and content. So now that I find myself stuck in this moment of helplessness, I'm slowly beginning to lose my grip on reality and hope…each day. First, I'm tired of where I work. I'm tired of doing the same thing over and over again for 4 years…looking at the same faces each day for the last 4 years…attending the same intense but pointless meetings each day for the last 4 years…all that minus any progression. I'm not sure how I allowed myself to get caught up in this web of monotony…I have never managed to stay at one job for more than two years…I'm an addict for bigger and better things. Going back to when I first got this job, I must admit it was a dream job in many ways. I LOVED the people I worked with. I was envious of my CEO, a thirty-something woman, who came up the ranks of middle class America, worked her way through the same corporate bullshit until finally breathing in some guts to start a successful venture of her own. To draw you a picture of where I worked, our office was a spacious, NY-style loft amidst the artsy district of Houston. Techno/Dance beats played all day long (music from all over the world from Claude Challe, DJ Tiesto to David Guetta and Danii Minogue)…FREE grocery (YES! you asked for anything on the grocery list and it was delivered to you every week)…every other Friday off…a fully-stocked kitchen to show-off your cooking talents…crazy fun happy hours and team building events (picnics at the park, bus rides to the theatre, volunteering at local charity events, lunch massages)…on any given day, the CEO could halt the work day at 5pm and walk us over to one of the nearby restaurants for a quick drink and a fresh breeze! The company was progressive and well reputed in the industry…we were honored amongst Fortune 50 companies and ranked highest in lists like The Fastest Growing Companies and Best Places To Work At. What I did? Maybe not too challenging…however required a level of discipline and tenacity I managed to look forward to and celebrate every day. The best feature of all was the team I worked with… we worked extremely well with each other in spite of our eccentricities…there was sportsmanship and mutual respect amongst everyone and a sense of loyalty and commitment. Most of all, I made two very special friends right here…at this place…hopefully for a lifetime! All the elements factored in my decision to remain employed at this company over the years. It was a place where you felt just downright COMFORTABLE…yes, I want to talk about COMFORT…because it is exactly what is pushing me out the door now. See when I felt COMFORTABLE at this place, I knew I'd be here for a while. COMFORT was healthy until the luxury of it sucked me in big time…to an extent I became immune to a structured schedule… as long as I enjoyed walking into a place for 10+ hours a day, I felt I had nothing else to worry about…spoiled…gradually…no headaches…I mean every other day you'd face a challenge to keep you going yet in the end, you knew exactly what to expect on your typical day…no belittling surprises…the feeling promotes a healthy life outside of work you know…you don't take home the unnecessary headache of a job with you…so it was a relief to have a steady, healthy, thriving, fun work day…then came stagnancy…you realized albeit a typical day at work wasn't a bumpy roller coaster ride, but from time to time, you craved to slip or fall or hit a wall to put those cells in your grey matter in motion so you can pick yourself up…give yourself a challenge…a chance to replenish your strengths…fuel your motivation level…inspire personal growth… all the right ingredients to a better ME…yet at the same time, COMFORT was too tough to let go of…unfortunately now I realize COMFORT is the sole cause of my restlessness...for it depleted me of all the right ingredients…what was I thinking??? I let myself be so consumed with COMFORT, I almost lost the desire to grow…it's killing me…to feel this way…the very essence of the company which inspired me to come work here now makes me want to leave the place…I HATE this comfort…I HATE the free food…I HATE fun parties…nothing seems to motivate me anymore…every day I want to wiggle out of my bubble…there are days I just want to YELL…LOUD. Isn't if funny? What I loved about my life only a few years back I despise now!!! Tells you life is indeed full of 180-degree surprises. BUT since I'm a fairly optimistic person who lives and breathes in the present moment to create my future and believes everything happens for a reason, I'm willing to approach this outlook from a more positive perspective. Just like success one moment can turn into failure the next, you should be nothing but hopeful a failure today can and will only turn into a success next, right??? So the way I look at life is it's never really that bad…you may think now is your worst moment…which means…it's only going to get better from here… after darkness, there's always light…everything in life is connected, one moment only leads to another…your worst now will push out the best in you later…some day in the future you'll be sipping your morning coffee smiling at today, hell you needed to be here today to be there tomorrow, right???!!! So…here's a little breakfast recipe for you to consume every morning you wake up (helps me with my sanity): A dose of patience, perseverance, hope and faith every day will keep the bad juju away!!! Here's CHEERS…to a new day!!!
signed: Thinker-Bell
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